Creepy Teacher

Hey baby ;D

Alright, folks, today I think I'll be telling you a little bit about a phenomenon little known to man as Creepy Teacher. If I had to describe him to you, I would incorporate these three people and morph them together. After that, you'd have Creepy Teacher.

And that folks, is Creepy Teacher. Creepy Teacher goes to my school. Actually, given the title, he TEACHES at my school. What he teaches is absolutely foreign to me. I'm thinking he's a professor in Awkward Eye Contact, Looming, and Contemporary Creeper Sciences. To be honest, I highly doubt he's a teacher. I have yet to see any students walk into his classroom. I kid you not, I pass that classroom, and chills run up my spine. Why? BECAUSE ALL HE DOES IN THERE IS STARE AT THE WALL, BLANKLY. He is a great starer. He can stare at anything. I know this because he stares at me all the time. And if you think I'm kidding, you are sadly sadly mistaken.

Example A. One day, I was having lunch. He is the lunch monitor. He stared over at me the whole time and passed my table to give me his best interpretation of what a autistic panther would look like stalking its prey.

Example B. One day, I was having lunch. The same thing that happened in Example A occurred.

Example C. One day, I was having lunch. Same as A and B.

Example D. Every day, I have lunch. And A, B, and C occur.

Example E. His classroom is directly across from the classroom in which I have Independent Spanish (a.k.a talk about boys all hour with the other two girls in there). My classroom also contains the Copy Machine. I believe that Creepy Teacher makes up reasons to use the copy machine. Like, I'm pretty sure he's just printing pictures of dead kittens and copying them over and over so he can come into my classroom. Because when he copies, he turns around and faces me the whole time. And stares. And stares. And stares some more.

Example F. Anytime he copies dead kitten photos or God knows what else someone that Creepy could copy, Example E occurs.

Example G. One day, I was having lunch, and the usual staring occurred. But this time, he came up to my table and started talking to a kid at my table. I believe this to be a ploy. Because, the kid was at the other end, yet Creepy Teacher moved closer up to me and propped his leg on the chair next to mine and leaned forward. This tactic is known to scientists today as "looming", which is used for the sole purpose of being CREEPY AS HECK.

I also found out some interesting information about Creepy Teacher this week. The kid who sits behind me in Trig is his son. This kid is also creepy, but far less creepy as his CREEPY CREEPY dad. The only thing about this kid that is creepy, is his astounding ability to breathe down my neck with fascinating closeness and subtlety. That and his love for playing footsie with my purse every single class time. But now, Creepy Teacher walks into my Trig to "say hello to his son". Please. We all know Creepy Teacher is there so he can smell the back of my head and loom over me, which is what I'm pretty sure he did yesterday.

Disclaimer: A lot of you know who Creepy Teacher is. And he may not be creepy to you, but I genuinely get goosebumps every time he passes me. Although it may not be extremely creepy, to me, he is. But he could be a great guy for all I know. A great guy who eats babies' souls.