Ode to a Playground Bully:
O, Dear Bully, you make me laugh,
When today we twice did pass,
You still look like you're on tons of drugs,
Yet I look like I get oodles of hugs!
Your eyes still have that glazed ghoulish glare,
Your teeth still look like a sharp scary snare,
Your clothes still look like they're salvaged from trash,
Your face still looks like it's been bashed.
But I'm not here to point or judge,
I don't even hold a silly little grudge,
Because I look in the mirror and I look at my side,
And I see happiness you couldn't describe.
I'm healthy, I'm smart, and I'm completely loved,
My eyes are clear and I've never done drugs,
So yeah, you scared the crap outta me in second grade,
But I'm victorious and I'm wonderfully made.
In your face, Leslie.
Update on Viva La No Vampires!: New anti-Vamp movie out soon! Called "Vampires Suck!". Look it up!
Today, I will be watching Titanic for three hours. Let's hope it's not a total waste. I'll update you on it soon!
We're all accustomed to seeing old men with young women nowadays. Which is why I think we should be accustomed to seeing single, nerdy twenty-year olds staring at babies in the maternity ward.
What is some weird stuff you collect? My top five:
1. Broken jewelry pieces
2. Jones bottles
3. Paper cranes
4. Fortune cookie papers
5. Magazine advertisements that suit my fancy
Weird expression of the week: Knock your socks off. Whenever something splendiferous happens, I do not have the tingling sensation of my unmatching socks being ripped off my toes. Just saying.
Annoying habit of the year: People adding unnessacary letters to their Facebook statuses. Example: "Omggg Brittannny, dId yOu sEE thAttt QT?"
MY translation: "Oh my gosh, Brittany, I have no life. So much, in fact, that I forgot how to correctly use the shift key and I confuse "cutie" with the abbreviation for "Quik Trip". This is why teachers hestitate to tell me it's getting close to summer, because they worry that the sun is going to influence my bad spelling and grammar even more so than in the fall."
SHOULD BE: "Omgg, Brittannnny, you should defriennnnnddd meeeee or else yourrrr mom will reporttt meh as a kindygArTener usingggg a FacebOok EEEE-legally."
We have candy called "Butterfingers." Is this encouraging delectable cannibal choice?
i loved the in your face, leslie bit. titanic is not a waste, it is sad but nothing near a waste. i collect broken jewelry too. i also mistook QT as the abbreviation for quicktrip. and yes. naming a candy butterfingers may induce buttering fingers and eating them.
ReplyDeleteHaha, I usually never use names, but...yeah, I wanted to. I shall watch it pronto! I always wanna use it for a necklace later on...never works out lol. And I find calling someone quik trip more attractive than "cutie"...how infantile.
ReplyDelete