A Short Post for Know-It-Alls

You little know it all. You think you're so tough. You think you know every little speck of information the world has ever acquired? Well guess what! Your pants are on fire. So there.

Don't you hate know-it-alls? We all have our areas of expertise, sure, but that one person who will never EVER let you have an opinion is the exact type of mammal that I want to put in a time capsule. That way people from the future can laugh at how primitive they are and the person will be humiliated for once in their life. I tried to talk to a know-it-all and this is how the conversation went down...sorta.

Me: I hear you like Green Day? I love that band!

Know-It-All: Yeah, I own every album.

Me: That's cool. My favorite song is "Little Girl".

Know-It-All: I don't pick favorites. I love all their songs equally. I'm a true fan because I love their songs equally.

Me: That's great...what's your favorite album, then?

Know-It-All: You can't love a band if you have to chose a favorite album. A true fan would know that.

Me: Yeah...I'm gonna bash my head in with a baseball bat now.

SUGGESTIONS TIME:

Good song: Chicago by Sufjan Stevens

Good movie: Stardust, Leap Year, and When in Rome

Good Thing to Do: Steal kittens for profit.

Everyone you should comment me a question and I shall answer it in extreme detail. Do it.

"I'm not short, I'm fun sized." No, you're just short. The only fun thing about your size is that you fit into small spaces like some sort of freak of nature. That and you can wear small children's clothing still. Other than that, there's nothing fun about you so stop wearing tee shirts about your size. "I'm not fat, I'm just in denial." Now there's a tee shirt with a message for you youngins.